White Bread

How does a formerly staunch non-baker develop their own take on classic white bread?  Same as any other recipe, be it cuisine or patisserie: good ole' trial and error!


First, my rant against bread machines.  They're the Sandra Lee of kitchen appliances- so much of the work is done for you, it takes the soul out of the food.  (That being said, the world would be a healthier place if everyone made their own bread, even if it's in a machine- have you seen the ingredients that go into your average store-bought loaf these days?)  Anyways, there's the issue of the bread itself.  I've yet to have bread baked in a machine taste as, well, "bready" as I prefer.  The texture always seems off, the crust seems a bit odd, the inside not as evenly cooked as bread baked in a real oven.  That being said, the devices are great for preparing all kinds of dough.  Is it hypocritical that I lambast the evils of the appliance, yet use it to mix and knead my dough?  Probably, but until I take a baking class or watch a high-def Youtube video to see how the gluten is properly produced with correct hand-kneading, I'll stick with my wicked little bread-maker.


So began the quest to conjure up the perfect recipe.  If I stumbled upon success, the household's Official Bread Connoisseur (also known as my husband) was, surprisingly, ready to give up a hardcore Orowheat "Country White Bread" habit that went back several years and consistently put a decent dent in our grocery budget at $5 per loaf.  After preparing a few recipes, I still hadn't found what I was looking for.  All of the loaves turned great- an accomplishment in itself considering I had no idea what I was doing- but none of the final products were as versatile as I'd preferred.  They were too sweet, or too dense, or way too fluffy.  I needed something that would do everything a slice by Country Oven or Orowheat could: make the perfect toast, grilled cheese sandwich, or redneck garlic bread.  


Cooks are human.  From the most inexperienced home foodist like myself, all the way up to the venerable Julia Child, the learning process to producing a sublime souffle is the same as, say, grappling with calculus.  Sometimes you absorb just enough to fake your way through- but eventually, you really "get" it.  The light bulb flickers on, and there's no stopping you.  Thus is my experience with baking.  Countless times throughout the years, two proverbs took up residence in my pea-brain: "Cuisine cooks usually can't bake, and vice versa", and "Baking is a science; cuisine is an art".  The former eclipsed the latter for far too long, until the day that we needed bread.  There, bore in the moment of necessity, I finally "got" it.  I'm good at understanding the principles of science (specifically that of chemistry), so what in the name of all things yeasty was stopping me from making my own version of the best mother-lovin' white bread?!


I let my inner mad scientist go to town.  Borrow a bit from that recipe, try this technique that doesn't make sense but worked for previous loaves, try not to stare at the oven as the magic happened.  What resulted is, in my mind, the perfect loaf of homemade white bread.


ZESTY ZAFTIG'S WHITE BREAD
Yield: 1 loaf


- 1 1/2 cups unbleached bread flour
- 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (plus 2-3 tablespoons)
- 1 tsp non-iodized salt
- 1 1/2 tablespoons lard, melted
- 1 1/2 tablespoons baker's sugar (info here)
- 1/2 cup warm water (around 100°F)
- 3/4 cup milk, hot


Pre-heat oven to 170°F for five minutes, then shut off.  Meanwhile, mix half of the sugar (3/4 tablespoon) in the warm water; stir in yeast to allow it to proof.  In a bowl or bread machine, sift together both types of flour, salt, and remaining sugar (3/4 tablespoon).  Melt the lard and heat the milk.  When the yeast is foamy, make a well in the center of the dry ingredients.  Drizzle the lard and milk around the well.  With the bread machine on  (and the paddle mixing the ingredients), or while hand-mixing with a spatula, stir in the water/yeast mixture.  Continue combining; knead (by hand or machine) until smooth and elastic.  If the dough is too sticky, add 1 tablespoon of flour at at a time until the dough is smooth.
Transfer the dough to a greased bowl.  Loosely cover with greased plastic wrap and place in warm oven.  Allow to rise one hour, or until doubled in volume.  Punch dough down to deflate; cover again and allow to rise 30-45 minutes or until doubled.  Remove from oven and carefully transfer to greased 9"x5" loaf pan, taking care to not deflate; once again loosely cover with the plastic wrap and allow to rise 10-20 minutes, or until the dough has risen to slightly above the top lip of the pan.  Meanwhile, preheat the oven to 425°F.  When the oven is heated, insert the loaf pan, and immediately reduce oven temperature to 375°F.  Bake for 30 minutes, or until the loaf is golden brown and sounds slightly hollow when the top if lightly tapped.  Remove from oven, gently remove from loaf pan, and allow to cool on a wire rack.